Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
The debates are over and it’s about time. If this is the price for living in a democracy, I’m glad I don’t live in one.
The last debate was the debate of the smiley face versus the serious face. Obama had a different face for each debate. Romney just had the one---smiley face. In the first debate, Obama didn’t bring a face. He wasn’t there. In the second debate he brought a smiley face like Romney, but it didn’t fit him. In the last debate he brought his serious face, which sometimes bordered on annoyed. At one point during the last debate, I thought Obama was going to turn to Romney and say, “Mitt, you ignorant slut.”
In the second debate, Romney said he had a five point plan. He never named any of the points in his plan. That’s a good plan. In the third debate Mitt Romney said he had a plan for the future, which he will tell us about in the future.
Romney said pay equity for women was an important topic, but not to him. The first question in the foreign policy debate asked the candidates what they would do if there was a threat from abroad. This sounds like a question for the GOP! “You do what you’d do to any dame who gets out of line. You take away their charge card! And their reproductive rights.”
Romney has a bold plan for day 1 of his presidency: "on day 1, I will name it day 2!" his five point plan has six points. I would prefer 9-9-9.
Romney’s talking point on Benghazi was wrong, but he kept going.
“Go on.” That was the smiling Obama.
Romney wasn’t backing down from his debate prep. “That’s not how we rehearsed it! I just want to make sure you repeat what you said because that’s not what your understudy said in rehearsal.”
If Mitt Romney gets elected president, he’ll send a Mormon mission to Iran. That’ll get them to disarm, or to zero in on a new target.
Romney’s plan for Syria? It’s worth more broken up.
Romney wants to be the education president, as long as the kids aren’t educated about him. "When I was Governor, our 4th graders came out number C."
When Mitt Romney talked about Israel, he started rhyming: “If Israel is under attack, Mitt Romney has got your back. Word to your mother. And would it kill you to call?”
Mitt Romney said he was a son of a…you’re darn right he is. At one point he referred to the audience as “folks” because he’s “folksy.” Mitt said he wanted to be America’s leader, but he needed the support of American voters and the support of magic underwear.
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Monday, October 22, 2012
#Register to vote: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fH8cfNVV4I8&feature=share&list=UUDumvOgECllIXOQ7xSys04w … #JamesTrippforPresident
"Our 4th graders came out number C." #Romney
This is the #debate of the Smiley Face vs. the Serious Face.
"On Day 1, I will name it Day 2!" #JamesTrippforPresident
He's a son of a...what? #Romney
#Mitt would like to be your leader with your support and the support of his magic underwear.
Part Tagg and Obama! They are incensed!Buy My Book:
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
October 16, 2012, 6:05 pm PST James Tripp @thejamestripp
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#Romney isn't answering the question.
#Obama is answering the question.
#Romney has a 5 point plan? What's on of those points?
#Romney won't be able to steal time tonight.
#Romney wants to privatize federal lands.
#Romney sounds like an Oil and Gas lobbyist.
Unsure of 5 point plan. Would prefer 9-9-9.
"Women's pay equity is an important topic, but not to me." #Romney
This #debate is being directed with fewer close ups than previous debate.
"My five point plan has six points:" https://www.facebook.com/jamestrippforpresident …
#Romney's answering a question!
#Romney's talking point is wrong and he's not backing down.
#JamesTrippforPresident: On #Guns: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EyNTMP8IPIw&feature=share&list=UUDumvOgECllIXOQ7xSys04w …
#Obama saved his 47% comment for his closer.
Sunday, October 14, 2012
If I learned anything from the vice presidential debates, it’s that clearly, Joe Biden likes a good laugh. Laughter is the best medicine, although that’s not what the Doctor wrote on my prescription. I wonder if my stand-up act could get as many laughs from the Vice President as Paul Ryan’s answers. If Joe Biden was in the audience, I’d book Paul Ryan to headline a night of comedy.
I expected them to be standing at podiums like the presidential debate. Instead, it looked like Charlie Rose, although this Charlie had long, blond hair. Joe Biden acted like a schoolmaster and Paul Ryan was Peck’s bad boy. I was expecting the vice president to give him the switch. “Stop lying, boy!”
Biden was the big dog, Ryan was the puppy. Biden schooled the boy. Paul Ryan got his ass kicked. He needs to go back to the gym. What distinguished Paul Ryan was how much water he drank. He must have been getting a work out. “I have to stay hydrated.” He probably needed to pee half way through the debate. No wonder he didn’t do better.
If that debate were a prison, Paul Ryan would have been Joe Biden’s bitch. It was like shooting a dead horse. I think I heard Karl Rove's head explode during the debate, which may be a good thing.
Joe Biden’s face stole Ronald Reagan’s line, "There you go again!" He also alluded to another vice presidential debate when he said, "Now you're Jack Kennedy." That joke always works.
When asked what he could give to this country that no one else could, Paul Ryan said, “Honesty.” He is a pretty honest guy except for that answer. He didn’t even believe it himself. He couldn’t finish saying it. When he caught himself saying what he was saying, he tried to stop himself from saying it, but it was too late, because he had already said it, so he just started talking about something else. That’s why Joe Biden was laughing.
Maybe Paul Ryan would be a good student government vice president. I’m not so sure about Vice President of the United States, or on second thought, student government vice president.
Paul Ryan’s smile was even more uncomfortable than Mitt Romney’s. Romney had a smile on his face the whole debate that made me wonder about the material from which his magic underwear was made. “Boxers or magic underwear?” Whatever magic underwear he was wearing for the first debate, he should keep wearing them. Not only are they magic, they’re lucky too.
Romney finally figured out how to win a debate. Defund the moderator. PBS is too Big Bird to fail.
The first debate was on domestic issues. Romney prepared by making sure all his household servants had their green cards. Domestic issues. Hmmm…
I would have liked to see a debate between candidate Mitt Romney for President vs. candidate Mitt Romney for Governor. I wonder who would win. Candidate Mitt Romney for Governor showed up at the first debate. Obama wasn’t expecting that. He was prepared for that other Romney. But Romney thought, “This would be a good time to shake my Etch A Sketch.
“My campaign office will gladly issue a retraction Tuesday for my statement today.” Romney will say whatever you want him to say. His campaign can always disavow it later.
Mitt Romney’s biggest concern in the debate was that corporations won’t buy corporate jets if the corporate jet buying tax break is eliminated. I know I won’t.
Everybody was expecting zingers from Mitt Romney. In preparation for the debate, I drank Red Zingers. That was gonna be my drinking game. I was gonna drink every time Mitt Romney scored with a zinger. It’s a good thing I was already drunk. Mitt Romney needs to take my comedy class.
It was a boring debate. It could have used a streaker…As long as it wasn’t Chris Christie.
I live tweeted the debates this year. Who is reading debate tweets when everyone is tweeting? Nobody. Nobody’s reading anybody else’s tweets. It’s not social networking. It’s social masturbating.
During the debate Romney said he knew what to do with government land; sell it to corporations. There are no small businesses, only small business owners.
The next debate will be in the form of a town meeting. That’s my kind of town.
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Saturday, October 13, 2012
James Tripp, Pat Devine, Cathy Ladman, Carol Ann Leif, Mike O'Connell, Carrie Snow, and Steve Tatham join host Bill Bronner to give "Advice for the Candidates."
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Thursday, October 11, 2012
October 11, 2012, 5:54 pm PST James Tripp @thejamestripp
The #tweeters are on the twack.
My #FlagPin is bigger than their flag pins.
#Ryan is barely limping along.
It's a good thing the hospital had an emergency room.
"...suddenly seized with concern for the debt they created." Good one, #Joe.
#KarlRove's head is exploding. Good.
#PaulRyan is getting his ass kicked. He needs to go back to the gym.
#PaulRyan doesn't understand the function of the courts.
Honesty? From #PaulRyan? Bad answer.
#PaulRyan must need to pee.
#PaulRyan would be a good student government vice president.Buy My Book:
Friday, October 05, 2012
Wednesday, October 03, 2012
In preparation for next week’s debate on domestic issues, #Romney made sure social security payments for his household servants are current.
is looking forward to the debate between candidate #MittRomney for President vs. candidate Mitt Romney for Governor. #2012Debates
is drinking Red Zingers in preparation for tonight's #debate.
will be looking for #zingers.
will tweet about tweets about the #debate.
will fact check #JimLehrer.
Red and blue ties. I get it.
Obama gets first #zinger.
I want #MittRomney at my 20th anniversary.
47 training programs? #Romney likes that number.
Under #Romney, government land = land for corporations.
There are no small businesses, only small business owners.
"I'm glad you asked that question, but I wish you would ask another." #Romney
#Romney wants to defund the moderator.
#Romney just said the economy is growing.
will not get a corporate jet if tax break is eliminated.
This #debate could use a streaker.
"The genius of America is...freedom" is going in my act. #Obama
That smile on #Romney's face makes me wonder what material his magic underwear is made of.