Trippitorial - "Super Pac vs Super Pac" - March 23, 2009

"Free Speech Show" - Loss of Privacy in the Digital Age

Here's today's podcast with me, Laurie Buckley, Dave Plunkett and host Bill Bronner:

The panel discuss the loss of privacy in the modern world.

"Comedy Nation This Week" - March 23, 2012

Here’s today’s podcast with special call in guest John Fugelsang, regular panelists Laurie Buckley, Dave Plunkett, James Tripp and host Bill Bronner:

Panelists discuss the Etch A Sketch flap, the Supreme Court Review of health care and more.

Trippitorial - Super Pac vs Super Pac

Sarah Palin’s Super Pac is in a fight with Barack Obama’s Super Pac and nobody likes any of Mitt Romney’s Super Pacs. Why can’t all these Super Pacs just get along?

This chapter began when comedian Bill Maher gave a million dollars to Barack Obama’s Super Pac. Now, normally I wouldn’t talk about another comedian with a better career than me, especially one that could employ me as a writer, although he does not, but Bill Maher crossed the line when he gave a million dollars to a Super Pac. He became a participant instead of an observer. He became a set up for one of my punchlines.

Now, I could have used that million dollars, but that’s not the point. That’s not why I’m talking about Bill Maher and I want to make that perfectly clear. I’m all for it. Get that money out of Hollywood. Send it to Washington and Madison Ave.

Oh sure, I have a one man show, which I could probably produce for only $950,000. That’s $50,000 in Bill Maher’s pocket! And if he wants to give that to Obama’s Pac, he should go right ahead, although I do have a short film I’d like to direct for funnyordie.com which I’m sure I could bring in at $49,727. And fifty cents.

Seventy-three dollars in Bill Maher’s pocket. Seventy-two-fifty.

But that’s not the point I’m trying to make. I’m sure the President of the United States could use the money. Oh sure, I have a sitcom pilot I wrote for myself which I could probably produce for a flat million, but I guess Clear Channel could use that money too.

Anyway, that’s not the point I was trying to make. The point I was trying to make is that conservatives preach that money is free speech. Bill Maher exercised his right to their kind of free speech by giving a million dollars to Barack Obama’s Super Pac and Sarah Palin used the millions from her Super Pac to try to cancel out his million dollars.

Why not just give it to me? I have a nice middle school recital about Alaska I could produce for only $400,000. But again, I digress.

Anyway, in an effort to deflect attention from the Republican’s “War on Women” and Rush Limbaugh’s attack on a woman far more intelligent than himself, Sarah Palin’s Super Pac, ShePac, produced a short attack ad on Obama for accepting money from Bill Maher because of some joke he made about her “frisky” daughter.

In the commercial, Palin’s Pac violates copyright law by stringing together a series of very funny Bill Maher monologue jokes which I hadn’t seen before because I don’t get HBO, in which he told jokes about Palin and her daughter. Palin was so offended by these jokes that she paid someone to edit them together so she could illegally rebroadcast them to an audience larger than the original HBO audience.

Sarah Palin is really hoping you’ll watch this video that derides her daughter.

"Thanks mom!"

I feel sorry for Bristol.  Her mother and the Republican Party have used her to spout propaganda written by others since the 2008 election.

In a new, slick multimedia blog which is being produced under Bristol’s name, which she began only weeks ago, “Bristol” attacks Obama for accepting Maher’s donation. The blog embeds ShePac’s video and chances are the blog entry is coordinated with her mother and ShePac.

You can fool some Republicans all of the time...

You know what the best thing about this video is? When it’s over,  the YouTube suggested links are to Bill Maher’s most recent free stand-up special “Crazy, Stupid Politics” in which I’m sure there are bound to be Palin jokes and to Alexandra Pelosi’s recent documentary short that was shown on Real Time about Mississippi Tea Partiers, which was less than flattering.

Thanks for the free advertising, ShePac! Don’t forget to say, “Fridays at nine!”

When Super Pacs start advertising about other Super Pacs, it’s time to pack in the Super Pacs!

Trippitorial - "Southern Strategy" - March 16, 2012

"Free Speech Show" - Drugs, Pharmaceutical and Recreational

Here's today's podcast with me, Laurie Buckley, Dave Plunkett and host Bill Bronner:

The panel discuss prescription and recreational drugs

"Comedy Nation This Week" - March 16, 2012

Here's today's podcast with me, Laurie Buckley, Dave Plunkett and host Bill Bronner:

The panel discuss the recent GOP primaries, the War on Women, Sudan and more.

Trippitorial - Southern Strategy

I have never eaten grits. I’m not opposed to eating grits, but I’m not going out of my way to eat grits. And I’m certainly not going to eat cheese grits. With all apologies to my farming constituency, dairy is not always my friend, but that’s another story.

I don’t even know…what are grits? I know what “true grit” is, but I don’t think that applies in this situation, although in the movie, I think there was a scene where somebody was eating grits, but it might have been just mush, although then it would have been “True Mush,” and that’s a different movie altogether. I never had mush either. Is there a mush constituency? I know mush has a consistency.

Anyway, the point I’m trying to make is that I don’t have a southern strategy. I have nothing against saying y’all, as a matter of fact, I just said it. It’s just that I typically don’t say it. I once said, “Blimey,” but that was in southern England. “Blimey!” It was kind of a Dick Van Dyke interpretation. But if I was to run for president, and I want to make it perfectly clear, I am not running, I don’t think I would change who I am.

Mitt Romney and Newt Gingrich like to pander. Newt’s better at it, probably because he looks like a panda. When Mitt panders, you just don’t believe him. If a presidential candidate talks to you like you're a redneck and it doesn’t bother you, you might be a redneck. If you know the Ten Commandments better than you know the bill of rights, you might be a redneck. Wait a minute. That’s not my act. That’s an act?

The Republican candidates in the race I am not in have had their fun in the South and now they’re on to Missouri, Puerto Rico and Illinois. I wonder if Mitt Romney knows the owner of the Cubs. Rick Santorum, on the other hand, is not too good at pandering. He told a newspaper in Puerto Rico that if the territory wants to become a state, they’re going to have to speak English, just like Jesus.  I guess that’s one way to court the Catholic vote.

Of course, maybe his real audience for that remarkable remark was in the States. Maybe he’s not as dumb as his religious beliefs. Of course, you have to be dope to listen to a Pope.

It’s like LBJ said when he signed civil rights legislation, “we’re gonna lose the south until the 2012 election.

Trippitorial - "Religion in Politics" - March 9, 2012

"Free Speech Show" - Sports---the New Opiate of the People?

Here's today's podcast with me, Laurie Buckley, Dave Plunkett and host Bill Bronner:

The Panel discuss Sports and Sports Betting.

"Comedy Nation This Week" - March 9, 2012

Here's today's podcast with me, Laurie Buckley, Dave Plunkett and host Bill Bronner:

The Panel discuss Super Tuesday, Religion in Politics and Brietbart's last release.

Trippitorial - Religion in Politics

I am tired of seeing religion in politics and I’m not too crazy about it in churches. Ever since our money was converted to God in the 1950’s, I haven’t trusted in the government and I never really trusted in money.

During the 1950’s a new translation of E Pluribus Unum was apparently adopted by the brave politicians of that time: “Out of many Gods, one,” a Christian God. I wasn’t alive in the 1950’s, but thanks to a prohibition on birth control, it wasn’t long before I would be. Shortly after I was born a prohibition ensued in my family, but that’s another story, and one I don’t take personally.

Up until the 1950’s, America had managed to keep religion out of the national motto. Although, “George Washington, Son of God.” Was rejected by John Adams in favor of “his Majesty the President,” which I wasn’t too crazy about, but that’s another story.

Apparently, during the 1950’s, the founding fathers were born again, not unlike the way dead victims of the Holocaust were reborn as “Latter Day Saints.” I was born again. Now my mother really hates me.

Don’t get me wrong. I love Jesus. Why, when I was a boy, I had one of those Jesus Christ plush toys, you know, the kind that sticks to the inside of your car window with suction cups.

One thing the field of Republicans can agree on is that they all love Jesus and they love him more than Obama loves Jesus, and he may be a Muslim anyway. But while they’re all worshipping Jesus, they’re all worshipping a different Jesus.

Newt Gingrich is worshipping the “Sick, heal thyself Jesus.” This is a Jesus you don’t hear a lot about.

Rick Santorum is worshipping the Calvin and Hobbes Jesus. Rick talks to Jesus and Jesus talks back. “I’m over here Rick. No, I’m over here. I’m over here. Jesus is everywhere!”

Mitt Romney’s Jesus was born in America. He was the first and greatest American.

Ron Paul’s Jesus is an expletive when he thinks about the other candidates in the GOP race.

They’re all worshipping different Gods too. I have to wonder about Rick Santorum’s God. What God would want Rick Santorum to worship him? Not me. That guy is not all there. I think the doctor dropped Rick Santorum on his head during his circumcision.

I don’t know what God Newt is following, but he seems to be having fun. I’ll bet it’s Bacchus. “Lovey, I think I’ll have another glass of wine.”

Mitt is following a bunch of different Gods, or one God who changes his mind a lot.

I don’t know if Ron Paul has a God, but chances are if he does, his God would eliminate religion from the federal government. I don’t think he would trust it on our money. I don’t think he trusts our money either---well, it’s the Federal Reserve’s money. Let’s face it. And I don’t trust them.

Trippitorial - "Education" - March 2, 2012

"Free Speech Show" - Mistakes, I've Had A Few

Here's today's podcast with me, Laurie Buckley, Dave Plunkett and host Bill Bronner:

"Mistakes, I've Had A Few"

"Comedy Nation This Week" - March 2, 2012

Here's today's podcast with me, Laurie Buckley, Dave Plunkett and host Bill Bronner:

The panel discuss recent deaths in the news, Iran, Education and more.

 

Trippitorial - Education

Are you as tired of book learnin’ as I am? Jesus Christ never went to college. Do you think you’re better than Jesus…who?

Americans are as smart as they need to be, as smart as I need them to be. Who do they think they are? Learnin’s too good fer ‘em! Snobby Americans! They want to make you like them---Smart! Don’t fall for that.

I’m James Tripp and I want to be known as the education president as long as the voters aren’t educated about me. I believe that people should be educated, but they shouldn’t be so educated that they vote for somebody else.

Do you want this country ruled by a bunch of college graduates? Of course not. I want a president I can throw up on and who can throw up on me.

America doesn’t work from the top down. It works from the bottom up. This doesn’t mean we’re all asses.

We don’t need people who know everything telling people who know nothing some things they might not want to know. We need people who know nothing to tell people who know something that nothing is better than something because only some people can know some things, but everybody can know nothing.

Elitists.

In America, anyone can grow up to be president as long as the voters don’t know any better. As soon as people realize they’re better off not knowing, they’ll be better Americans. And by the way, I know. And I’m not gonna not know.

Elitist.

Don’t bite that apple! And go to church! Sinners. You’re all sinners in the hands of an angry god!